Contracted (2013) Not Your Average STD Flick

Pegged as what "Jaws" did the beaches "Contracted" does for sex is a bit of the stretch when it comes to  Eric England's new lesbian/horror film. And what should of been a great horror film falls flat.

"Contracted" follows a heartbroken Samantha who has just had an argument with her girlfriend and is forced back to live with her ever hovering mother. Samantha attends a party thrown by her friend, Alice, whose sole purpose it seems is to get Samantha drunk.  Later she meets a man calling himself BJ who slips her a date-rape drug. The two end up in a car where BJ takes advantage of her drunkenness and that of being drugged. The next morning Samantha wakes up severely hungover in her own room not sure what happened the night before. As the day progresses, however, it becomes evident that what she thought was a hangover isn't normal as Samantha begins to have period-like symptoms, beginning with heavy bleeding when she uses the bathroom. Then at work Samantha finds it hard to concentrate and is forced to leave early and heads to the doctor who at first thinks that she has contracted a STD from her one-night stand. Later on Samantha talks to Alice about the party and learns that the police have come by looking for a man that might of possibly been there. Not only that, but if anyone had come in contact with him as well. But do to the drug that was slipped to her Samantha fails to make a connection. Over the next couple of days, what she believed as a normal sickness becomes clear that it isn't anything of the sort as things go from bad to worse.

 

While I thought that "Contracted" had a great idea and premise the film ends up becoming muddled rather quickly. Eric England's attempts to gross out the viewers falls short and fails to actually achieve any desired effect. Along with the that, there is an underlying subtext that is prevalent throughout of that we are all shallow and self absorbed that becomes increasingly annoying as simple things are never addressed. Case in point: Samantha has blood draining from both eyes and the only thing people have to say is: "you look like shit". Really? No kidding . Then when the doctor she sees thinks what she has is something viral, his advice for Samantha to go home and not come in contact with anyone until the blood work comes in. Come on. Even a half wit, inbred doctor would of called an ambulance and have rushed to the hospital.

By the end of the film Eric England ties it all together of what is happening. Unfortunately that point was painfully obvious fifteen minutes into the film. A fact that would of been fine if the characters that populate the film weren't so horribly annoying.

In the end, "Contracted" at best, gets 2 out 5 Severed Heads. And that's because I thought that there was a great idea that was just poorly executed.


 Until Next time...

Only Lovers Left Alive (2014)

While we have become to use to Vampire love being set against angsty teenagers that have to deal with the daily tidings of high school and small town life. Where the vamps are able to come out side on cloudy days to pretend to be one the lonely hearts that have to deal with growing pains and teenage love. These same vampires that sparkle instead of burn when hit with the sun. So I am a little hesitant when it comes to vampires and love stories now. But thankfully the growing trend when it comes to the blood suckers of the night is that they are getting back to their roots.

"Only the Lovers Left Alive" is set against the desolation of Detroit and Tangiers. A desolation that only vampires and dark beings can find romantic. Adam, a reclusive musician and vampire, who has influenced countless other musicians through the centuries of his being, sulks inside of dilapidated old house in Detroit. Spending his time recording music on outdated recording equipment. Laminating about the state of affairs that has become the human race.

Adam reunites with an old love from better days: Eve, who has spent the last several years living in Tangiers. However, their debauched idyll will soon be disrupted when Eve's wild and uncontrollable sister invades their lives as well as adoring music fans of Adams.

Can they survive all that awaits them as the modern world seemingly collapses around them?        

IN FEAR -- Full Trailer

Sometimes it just doesn't pay to take a road trip. And this is exactly the case with the UK horror flick (released by Anchor Bay) "In Fear".

Shot in real time we follow the night that Tom and Lucy are trapped on country roads being stalked by an unknown person hell-bent on turning their worst fears into reality.

Having only been dating a couple of weeks Tom and Lucy decide to head out to an Irish Music Festival topped off with a night at a rustic country hotel. However, once Tom starts following the signs to his destination he realizes that they are just leading him around in circles. As it begins to get dark they stop and try to get their bearings. While they are out of the car Tom and Lucy begin to see things: Human figures darting in and out of the darkness, trees falling near the car. Something is out there and they are no to sure just who or what it is. And if they will survive the night.

Directed by: Jeremy Lovering
Staring: Iain De Caestecker (Tom), Alice Englert (Lucy)

Stuart Gordon's Castle Freak - You're Throwback Thursday Horror Film

Master of Horror, Stuart Gordon loves his HP Lovecraft and that's what we surely get with "Castle Freaks"!

Based on the short story "The Outsider" this horror fest went straight to DVD back in '95.

John Reilly inherits a 12th Century castle that once belonged to a famed Duchess. John does what anyone would that just inherited a castle: Let's go spend some time there as we try to sell it ! So, as the song says: He scooped the family and moved to Beverly. Except this Beverly was Italy. However, John and family have no idea that there is a horrible monster (of course there is) being kept under lock and key in the basement. Not only is it a horrible beast but it is the Duchess' own son who she imprisoned there as revenge against her husband who left her.

Soon, the disfigured beast has escaped by means of breaking off his own thumb to get out of the manacles which bind him. The only reference to the H.P. Lovecraft story occurs when the monster beholds his hideous reflection in a mirror. He has emerged hungry for blood, leading to a series of unexplained deaths and disappearances including that of a prostitute John has picked up and brought to the castle after being rejected by his wife. The prostitute is sexually mutilated and killed by the monster

As John becomes the prime focus for the murder by the cops he must figure out what it is that is stalking the interior of his castle before it takes out it's aggression next upon his family. As John investigates he learns what other terrible secrets that not only lie inside the castle but in himself as well. Ending in a climatic roof-top battle. 




Until Next Time...

31 Days 31 31 Picks Trick Or Treat ( FULL MOVIE 1986) by Kas-g

Aaahhh, the horrors of playing your favorite heavy metal album backwards, something that kids today CAN NOT do.

Taken from the scourge of the 1980's Big Brother watch-dog groups the likes of which of Tipper Gore's (Al's wifey-poo) PMRC and the ever popular TV Evangelists (when they weren't throwing lavish sex parties... yes that means you Jim and Tammy Faye) when they would prowl Dateline type shows and Current Affair television (think E! News or that of Access Hollywood to know what the fuck I'm talking about), 1986's "Trick Or Treat" follows the poor outcast teenager Eddie Weinbaur after he learns of the demise of his fav heavy metal dude Sammi Curr.

Completely devastated, Eddie goes to his friend "Nuke" (Gene Simmons), a radio DJ who knew Sammi Curr personally. To take Eddie's mind off the death of his idol, Nuke gives Eddie the only copy of Curr's last and only unreleased album, "Songs in the Key of Death", on an acetate disc (Unlike ordinary vinyl records, which are quickly formed from lumps of plastic by a mass-production molding process, a so-called acetate disc is created by using a recording lathe to cut an audio-signal-modulated groove into the surface of a special lacquer-coated blank disc, a real-time operation requiring expensive, delicate equipment and expert skill for good results. They are made for special purposes, almost never for sale to the general public. They can be played on any normal record player but will suffer from wear more quickly than vinyl. Some acetates are highly prized for their rarity, especially when they contain unpublished material). Nuke plans to play the album in its entirety on-air at midnight on Halloween as tribute, since according to Nuke, that was always Sammi's plan for the album's debut. 

Once back home, Eddie falls asleep listening to the record and has a strange dream about the fire that killed Sammi Curr. When he wakes up he finds that the record is skipping and after listening to it for a few seconds he comes to realize that there is something not right about the words the record is stuck on. Having previous experience with hidden lyrics, Eddie plays the record backwards but receives more than he imagined: Sammi Curr speaking to him from beyond the grave.

Of course only things can go wrong from here... lol... Along with Gene, look for Ozzie playing a priest on TV news.

Until Next time...  

31 Days 31 Picks Sleepaway Camp (1983) [UNCUT] [HD] Full Movie

The 1980's spawned a plethora of wannabe 'Friday the 13th' films and 'Sleepaway Camp' is no different.

'Sleepaway Camp' follows the story of an introverted teen girl, Angela Baker, struggling with her self identity --in more ways than one. Angela's father and brother were killed in a strange boating accident when she was a young girl. Since Angela is so painfully shy she is sent to camp to possibly open her up emotionally. However things start to go horribly wrong after her arrival with an ending that needs to be seen.

Until next time...

31 Days 31 Picks TEETH - OFFICIAL TRAILER

A story about a girl and her... um... overly hungry private area... lol

Dawn O’Keefe attends the group and is the spokes person for the Christian abstinence group called The Promise.  One evening after giving a speech about the purity ring worn by members of the group, she is introduced to Tobey and finds him attractive. Dawn has fantasies about marrying Tobey, although after acknowledging the attraction, they agree that they cannot spend time together. Soon after they give in and meet at a local swimming hole. After swimming together, they go in to a cave to get warm and begin kissing. Dawn gets uncomfortable and tries to get them to go back. Tobey then attempts to rape Dawn, who panics and tries to push him off. Tobey becomes aggressive and shakes Dawn, resulting in her smacking her head on the ground. While she is dazed, Tobey takes the opportunity to begin raping her. Dawn fights back and inadvertently bites off his penis with her vagina.

And that's just the beginning... lol

How can on go wrong with a film about Vagina dentata?

Until next time... maybe you should keep it in your pants.

31 Days 31 Picks Jug Face Official Trailer 1 (2013) - Horror Movie HD

The best way to describe "Jug Face" is that it's part "Deliverance", Part "Wicker Man" (the good version. Not that fucked up shit pile that Nic Cage was in).   

"Jug Face" tells the story of a pregnant teen trying to escape a backwoods community when she discovers that she may be sacrificed to a creature in a pit. What else needs to be said?

Until next time...